Difference between revisions of "Mordor"

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(Get in: stop shouting :) :))
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Mordor is quite unique amongst A-list destinations in that it tends to see ''you'' rather better than you see ''it''.
[[Image:Vacation_in_Mordor.jpg|thumb|right|300px|The peaks of Mordor are not be taken lightly]]
[[Image:Vacation_in_Mordor.jpg|thumb|right|300px|The peaks of Mordor are not be taken lightly]]

Revision as of 10:43, 1 April 2010

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Mordor (Sindarin: Black Land, Quenya: Land of Shadow) is located in South East Middle Earth to the east of the River Anduin.



Thoroughly unpleasant. The region of Mordor has rarely been dealt kind hand. Successive colonial powers have done little to clean the place up and there is still no functioning train service. The recent large scale eruption of Mount Doom, and the associated collateral damage just might (only might) encourage a more enlightened approach to development in the region.


Mordor is surrounded on three sides by large mountain ranges: Ered Lithui (Ash Mountains) in the the north, Ephel Duath (Mountains of Shadow) to the west bordering the region of Gondor, and extending round to the south. Generally they are not very nice.


Orcish is the native tounge. Strangely similar to English.

Get in

One does not simply walk in to Mordor. You gotta rock in to Mordor. Or take the shortbus.

Get around


Mordor is quite unique amongst A-list destinations in that it tends to see you rather better than you see it.

The peaks of Mordor are not be taken lightly


  • Trekking through any of the Mordor ranges should not be taken lightly. An authorised, experienced guide is recommended. One agency in particular seems to have some success: precioussestours.com, but they do demand payment in gold rings and the lead guide can be a touch moody.





Do not sleep in Mordor.


Get out

  • In the talons of an eagle, back to the rather dull German settlement at Minas Tirith
  • Hardier, adventurous types might try a cruise in the Bay of Belfalas.
This was an April Fool's Day joke article. We amused ourselves tremendously in making it. Please refrain from dragging out the silliness and plunge forward on some real articles!