Difference between revisions of "James Bond Goldeneye Tour"
Revision as of 21:13, 22 November 2013
For the seventeenth adventure of Sir. Ian Fleming's ever popular spy/lady killer series, secret agent extraordinare James Bond travels the globe in a race to prevent a worldwide financial meltdown. As Pierce Brosnan's first jaunt into the tuxedo, Goldeneye relaunched James Bond as a viable film franchise after Timonthy Dalton's ill fitting double showing.
So if you're ready, grab that Walther PPK, down that Vodka martini, and rev up that BMW Z3 and let's hit the road.
Arkhangelsk The infamous opening shot. To gain entry into the chemical weapons factory, James bungie jumps from the top of a dam. Trevelyan is of course already inside, "You're Late 007"
Monte Carlo After a thrilling car chase through the French Alps with Ms. Onatopp, 007 suits up and settles in at the Bacarat table. The Monte Carlo casino is one of the most recognizable landmarks in Europe. After losing to James, Xenia is understandably miffed "Enjoy it while it lasts. "
London Called back for a briefing with M after the theft of the EM shielded Eurocopter Tiger, James is tasked with finding out who is behind the plot. Stopping by Q's laboratory to pick up a few gadgets, Bond drives off in his new Z3 but not before Q gives him some sage advice "Need I remind you, 007, that you have a license to kill, not to break the traffic laws. "
Siberia Xenia and Ourumov fly the Tiger to fictional secret weapons facility Severnaya deep in the Siberian tundra. Using a suprise inspection as a ruse, they murder everyone and steal the Goldeneye control key. Here we are introduced to the lovely Natalya and Boris who likes word games and says things like "I am invincible!"
Saint Petersburg Needing more information Bond heads to Saint Petersburg to meet up with American agent Jack Wade who points him in the direction of Valentin Zukovsky. Their meeting is surprisingly cordial "Walther PPK, 7.65 millimeter. Only three men I know use such a gun. I believe I've killed two of them."
Having escaped with Natalya, Ourumov leads Bond on a merry chase through the streets of Downtown Saint Petersburg. Commandeering a T-55 tank James is hot on the pursuit and lays waste to trucks, cars and APCs not to mention a certain Bronze statue. " Use the bumper! That's what it's for!"
Cuba Having spiked Boris's computer 007 and Natalya follow the signal to Cuba. Now where does one find a giant satellite dish in the middle of the jungle?
Now being an international secret agent is pretty much the opposite of safe, but if you are planning on following James through the tour above there are a few points you should keep in mind.
1) Always research the local laws and check in with your national embassy before visiting a foreign country.
2) It's helpful to learn a few basic safety words and phrases in the local language in case of emergencies.
3) Never carry around more cash then you need for that day's excursion. Leave your valubles in the room or hotel safe if offered.
4) And as said by 007 himself, always be vigilant:
Xenia Onatopp: You don't need the gun, Commander.
James Bond: Well, that depends on your definition of safe sex.